I guess after reading the title of this post you either think I’m completely crazy or you are kinda intrigued by an opinion that doesn’t necessarily follow the norms of society. I’ve seen tweet after tweet and post after post about how it’s “unhealthy ” to delete social media for a relationship. And how “weak” you must be if you feel like you even need to. Well today I’m here to share my story, and to let you know it’s not always an unhealthy decision. And I certainly didn’t feel weak after deleting.
So let’s take it back to the beginning of my relationship with my fiancé. I’ve shared small windows into my relationship on my YouTube channel in my video titled Mini Girlfriend/Boyfriend Tag. In that video I mentioned how me and my fiancé hardly if ever argue and fight, that wasn’t always true in our relationship. We went through a very rough patch in the beginning of my relationship where I struggled very hard to trust and seriously open up to Reece (my fiancé). I was so damaged from previous relationships and I unfortunately never sought out to address those issues before I had entered our relationship. I always felt like there was someone else, I was constantly accusing and harassing him over who he was talking to and what he was doing, it was seriously damaging our bond we worked so hard to develop.
Because I was worried about who he was talking to, obviously his social media was a huge stress to me. Stressing over who’s pictures he was liking, what he was commenting on. I was a complete mess. Would you believe it if I told you we’ve probably blocked and unblocked each other a million times! We were seriously in trouble. Until one of us (I honestly don’t remember who’s idea it was) decided enough was enough and boom, instagram deleted. At the time I wasn’t blogging or on YouTube so the numbers didn’t have an effect on me. It was the simple fact I had FOMO(fear of missing out). When we took away what was causing the majority of the problems and worked on our relationship things got better. I wasn’t worried about who or what he was doing because seeing he cared enough about me and my insecurities to put his entertainment aside and focus on me made me want to “get better”. I focused more on myself we built the indestructible relationship we have to this day. While yes I still have insecurities I no longer stress about who or what he’s doing. Taking time away from the world to focus a little more on us was the best thing we could have possibly done.
We live in a time where social media and just the digital world in general has the power to eat you alive. There are so many people who are literally only on the internet to see you upset. But I’ve Aldo found that having a “healthy feed” ( away from negativity and drama) is healthy. I actively follow pages that make me happy now and I’d like to think Reece does too. Taking out break from social media made us address our issues with each other instead of subtweeting and just not talking at all. Social media can be very toxic in relationships and I think that’s important to know. We’d like to think that “of you worry about social media than it’s something wrong with you” and that’s not true. There are people who get jobs based off of social media, people that meet their SO on social media. I don’t think I’d even know Reece right now if it wasn’t for Twitter back in the day Haha!
Social media in healthy doses is not a terrible thing. And deleting social media to focus on what’s right in front of you isn’t a bad thing either. We are and have been in our best state relationship wise, simply because we stepped away and took the time to really focus on each other away from the temptations of the internet. It’s so easy to ignore a call and subtweet or bash them online and I was so tired of that cycle.
What are your thoughts on deleting social media for a relationship?
Keep in touch!